April 2011
March 2011
You’re already following this blog, right? Right.
http://scissorhands20th.blogspot.com/
I hate whenever a stupid bumper sticker gets under...
rachelkristin:
“God Bless my PROLIFE mom-AND YOURS!”
Nope. My mom is PRO FUCKING CHOICE. She just chose to have me.
Also, is it just me or is it just moronic to get your political views, thoughts on wars, religion, etc. in bumper sticker form?
In general, bumper stickers are pretty bad. But specifically political ones. I hate seeing nice cars with stickers on the paint that are for...
Truthful Tuesday
I met a bunch of work colleagues in person for the first time this past week. I was relieved to know that I wasn’t the only one who uses an especially flattering profile picture of myself in the employee directory. Everyone was “fatter in person” and it made me smile. Although, I did give myself bonus points because my picture is about 6 months old — some other people are...
Truthful Tuesday
I know several black people who look like famous black people. But I’ll never say it because I’m afraid it will make me sound like a racist asshole.
I’m working on a new craft project that I dreamed up late last night. It’s really fun and I feel pretty smug about it.
I’m interested in streaming more content from Comedy Central and Adult Swim and it seems like this can be done using PlayOn or a similar app. Some cost a one-time $30 fee and some are $3.50 a year… not sure which to pick.
Does anyone use paid apps for Roku?
Roku has changed my life
I’ve now become one of those people who watches TV all day. Not saying it’s a bad thing; now you know where to find me.
5 tags
latest craptastic development
So yesterday, I nearly died. Sorta. Suspected terrorists, near plane crash, etc. All in a day’s work. So then I get to the airport and the car service that I’d arranged is there waiting for me except I was expecting a van and they sent a party bus. Ok, funny - ha ha ha ha, let’s go home.
Then I got the bill. $500, no joke.
FML.
Showtime to Keep Current Originals Off Netflix in... →
styro:
bluishorange:
lowindustrial:
“Current and past seasons of our original series will be available to our authenticated subscribers via our TV Everywhere service Showtime Anytime,” a Showtime spokesperson said.
Somewhere Jack Donaghy’s ears are turning red.
Never badmouth synergy, Raza.
I love all the obstacles people want to put in place to prevent you from watching their shows....
I'm just gonna leave this here... →
sblaufuss:
Shit has me rollin’.
Oh Jeebus. This is good.
Co-worker today:
shaebay:
sblaufuss:
“What’s that site you’re always looking at, with the cute little monsters eating the computers?”
THIS IS THE SADDEST AND FUNNIEST POST TO EVER EXIST.
There's a breed of cats called Munchkins. They...
sblaufuss:
shaebay:
Looking at this munchkin cat lessens the urge to rip out my uterus and feed it to rabid raccoons.
I used to know a lady like this.
Super cute, but I don’t like breeders who manipulate animals to have some desired effect like this, just so we can say “awww.” Corgis have a naturally selected reason for short legs, cats do not.
I survived
After our “what if they’re terrorists?!” flight delay, we headed out and then hit strong head winds… meaning that our flight took even longer. We finally get to LAX and are just about to be wheels-down and the plane in front of us on the runway makes a sudden stop, meaning that there’s not enough space for us to land. So the pilot executed an emergency take-off (he...
I have to turn off my phone for takeoff
I’m on my plane, AA75 from Dulles to LAX and 2 young guys (late teens, early 20s) decided to get off the plane just as we were leaving the gate. Their seat mate says that they asked her if there was a train to LA and she said yes and then they asked to get off.
The flight attendant flagged them as suspicious (middle eastern) so the captain decided to do a double check of all luggage....
Today is over.
The only teeny tiny bright spot was the catering at our party, which contained Oreos dipped in chocolate and topped with whipped peanut butter.
The chocolate dipped strawberries, brioche donut holes, and baby cupcakes weren’t bad either. Oh, and the Snickers baked inside phyllo dough? PERDY DAMNED GOOD.
Sometimes I feel weird about how strange I am. That’s good, right? Self awareness or whatever?
Anyway, I am dyeing my hair in my hotel room right now.
Dear Front Desk Clerk:
I know, I know. The night shift is rough. You’re sitting at a desk all night long. This is a small boutique hotel, so there’s not a lot of traffic coming through. It’s quiet. It’s warm. It’s boring. Maybe you take a nap every night on the job and no one ever knows - no one’s coming and going, how would anyone know? Is the boss going to watch the security camera...
The Vegkat: New crush →
vegkat:
I’m watching an old Space Ghost and Todd Barry is the guest. I know he’s not much of a sex symbol, I think he’s super sexy. He was the opening act when I saw Ricky Gervais and after the show he was haning out in the lobby of the theater selling his cd. I walked right by him and he smiled at me and…
I never used to stop and talk to comedians after shows, because I figured...
1 tag
To the Bitter Survivor Co-Worker:
Hey look, I’m glad you’re here on Earth and everything and congrats on besting that damned disease. But why can’t you be like the people on TV? They beat cancer and they’re like “Oh, this is a second chance at life! Let’s go parasailing!” Instead, you’re the worst kind of opposite. Instead of overflowing with gratitude for a life truly appreciated,...
1 tag
To the 20-20 Hindsighter:
{background situation: due to some technical hiccups one of our servers went down temporarily, with extremely unfortunate timing, which totally ruined a marketing campaign we spent months working on}
Hey, thanks for your suggestion! Thanks for telling me that if you had known about my team sending an email (which is our job, we do this daily - which you are fully aware of, along with everyone...
1 tag
To the lady mashing the hell outta that crosswalk...
The mechanism that alerts the signal that there is a person waiting to cross does NOT take a headcount. It’s not thinking “Oh shit, 200 more pushes?! That means 200 more people just turned up! I’d better make this a short green light so that those people can get where they’re going!” Just like an elevator, one press is enough. Sadly, I think this is why they get...
AT LAST, THE RESULTS
davidmalki:
It started right here: STEPS 1-3
Four days later, the envelopes arrived. Note the early sign that not all directions were followed exactly:
WHAT IS INSIDE????
Exactly, 100% the opposite of what we asked for. There is a severe lesson here:
THEY’RE ALWAYS OUT TO SCREW WITH US
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